Today I woke into a soft dream after all the darkness that has passed of late. I had to close my eyes again and lie very still for several minutes. I know that sometimes a dream, however wonderful, can slip away as the mind wrestles with the body to waken it. Dreams can slip into the subconscious to be lost forever. So I expected it may be. Then suddenly I knew it was not a dream. I felt a shiver as I lay on the soft grass under our flag and something passed through me as though…. well I cannot say for I do not remember feeling this way before. But it was wonderful. It was gentle and fulfilling and swept me of darkness.

It was a day of strange things for me yesterday….. I woke in the dark; both body mind and soul as much as the gloom of the caves. I felt fear and despair and all the things the darker places of the lands can invoke. I had a moment where I doubted myself….doubted my purpose…doubted my dedication….doubted my ability to even dare to imagine I could lead someone to the Clerichood…. I doubted how long my mind would be able to keep them within it. And without that - as much as losing my gods… I would be lost and dead indeed.

Then it seemed all turned to the gods - even in that gods forsaken place. I had prayed. Of course I had prayed. But without hope and that is no prayer at all. Then it seemed that all started to fall into place. I came to the farthest reaches of the deeper darkness and she was there - dear Sorynn. Last I had heard of her was good Abalan telling me in hesitant tones, and as humble as he always is, that he was concerned. That he had found her upon Worldbuilder Lawn and she had told him she had a fever. I have neglected her - how can I not have know that. Yet here she was - and not just she - she held watch over a Blue guardian whose existence I have come to doubt! The battle went by in a blur - it seemed I was more than eager and ready to bring it down. Perhaps it was all the waiting. It yielded nothing - nothing I could take to the Elucidators…. But it was a treasure anyway. I passed it to her. Then, wholly unexpected, she gently pressed something into my hands. It was a beautiful bracelet - perfect in construction and skilfully done. Somehow she had managed to capture and weave together red and white flowers that glow like jewels. She fastened it onto my wrist and I felt as though…. it was as though Cory’s light shone from the bracelet and his blinding light from her herself. It pierced the darkness as surely as any bright torch. I felt quite overwhelmed and sank myself down against the wall and leaned back. I murmured something - I cannot remember what and I am sure she had something to say to me - but it remained unsaid. I finally got some rest. It was a clear rest, if slightly uneasy and brief in duration, without being bathed in shadows and surrounded by dark fear. When I awoke she was gone but I felt less heavy than I have. I felt able to get up and get on and I did.

Later I heard some news. A man had been talking to Derema about prayer and had said he always asked for something big and perhaps that was why his prayers went unanswered. Then as he prayed a miracle happened! A giant Treasure Box appeared at his feet and then either turned into, or opened to reveal, nothing but red smoke. Surely then the gods were with them and listening and watching and surely this was a reminder that the gods are not their to fulfil dreams….. whatever it was I know it now to have been a good sign. When first it happened, I knew none of the particulars and had not spoken with the adventurer and was filled with anxiety. I sent a message to Knight Raffe as he was abroad…the Knights should always know of such things. Then by some strange coincidence one of the arachnids lost a treasure box to me as it lay dying. It is still not open…. I have not seen one in so long I had almost forgotten what they are. I am sure the boxes themselves must come from some distant trader - but it must be a secret trade indeed. I have never seen among the craftsmen a skilled carpenter… I suppose the land has greater need for armour and weapons. Wherever they come from I was glad to see it.

And so the day (or night, I knew not which) lumbered on until I slay a creature and in panic heard something and spun around ready to attack again. At first I was sure my eyes must be deceiving me. In the gloom there was a brightness and the shape tall…. I hesitated and it would have been my downfall - but as my eyes adapted I realised it was them. They had come to me even in that dreadful place. I was sure the goddesses had come back to my mind and given me a glorious vision. But they spoke and were there and had arms that were real enough as they took me to them and spoke calming words. I felt as though there was a shield wrapped about me. Even in that terrible dark place there was light. The moments they quietly held me there seemed an eternity - will seem an eternity - whenever I recall them. As we moved gently apart the dark fell away and brilliant light came into me though it did not show itself in the tunnels. Suddenly they raised their ring up for me to see. ‘Could you?’ they said. Everything stopped for a moment - I did not comprehend. Could I what…… then embarrassed I realised they could not see and being the great warrior they are felt unprepared to face a danger they could not see. Though they have forsaken that place their blessings had not forsaken me and soon both our rings shone in the darkness. That made them seem much easier in one way and more anxious in another. They could sense danger ahead. They said I had been too long in the dark and it was time for some light. We fought our way out together - they lifted me up out of the sticky holes into the corridors above. I do not know whether it was emotion or sheer exhaustion but my arms would not pull me up. And then there! I ran right into the thing. Another guardian. Another dull treasure. But it was a sign I am sure. Their charged blade shone in their hand and they sensed further danger. They slipped a sand-burster claw into my hands and whispered that it was to keep me safe. I was overwhelmed suddenly by their care of me - it still feels like such a wonderful, precious thing and something undeserved still. I reached up and kissed them and then rushed into those last tunnels slaying all in our path.

Finally we were at the tree. I do not know what came over me but I felt suddenly tied there in the dark land. It was trying to keep me there as much as the other trees in the dark forest leaned away. Their voice broke the spell….’almost there dear one…’ and we were in the light. They knew now I think that I was on the edge of my strength. They strode North and I followed and they were waiting for me at the trainer. Dear Ural - how good to see him. I did remember to bow and as he bestowed upon me new skills I was watching their dear face as they were mine. I hope Ural did not think me rude.

I saw then that they looked as tired as I. They told me to find rest at the memorial garden as they returned to their duty. I murmured something as they flashed from view and was not sure they had heard. I stumbled off to the garden and lay down thankfully at the feet of the Kimaldian’s of old - so brave and inspiring. And a message came - my words came back to me. Beautiful. I toyed with the beautiful bracelet of blooms twined about my wrist and sleep did come over me.

So yes - I woke to this soft dreamlike state. Many things I think of in the pale morning light. They came to my mind as soon as I awoke and the cloak about my shoulders felt as their arms. Soft and warm and safe.

The gods spoke many times to me yesterday. My prayers were answered in that my dear sister in good health - she says - came to me and a guardian that I have prayed for the wisdom and skill to find was before me. Two prayers answered. News from the adventurer who received a sign from the gods that prayer is listened to always. Three prayers answered. They came to me - how I yearned and prayed for that. Four prayers answered. Ural received me and they were there to see it. Five prayers answered. Words from Laila and Leyah. Six prayers answered. Sweet rest in the clean air of our garden. Seven prayers answered.

Joy, love, happiness, fulfilment untold. The most blessed woman in the land writes on this page.