The turns have been long and the nights even longer. Sometime I feel as if I am standing alone - lost on the outside looking in at everyone - even if I am standing in the midst of a crowd seemingly enjoying myself. What am I supposed to do with that exactly? I dare not tell just how lost and uncertain of myself I feel -- or what Images I see in the darkness surrounding me. Disobedience. Evil. Greed. Dishonestly to name a few. life shattered in one fell swoop by men who disobeyed the Gods - and in one split-marc learned the torment and anguish of everlasting sin and passed it on like a parasite into hearts of future men.

When might our Gods See this evil some men hold in their hearts? Wrong choices and wrong decisions. Betrayal. Murder. Hate. Greed. Envy. When will they see it is time to cleanse? When comes the point where our creators say "ENOUGH!!" -- and really DO cleanse the earth of all life as I have seen it in my dreams - dreams where all past life perishes except for some flora and the animals and a few of the Gods most trusted men. In my dreams the animals survive - saved simply because they are without sin and evil; they can not reason the same way as men therefore they cannot make a choice based on thought, reason or logic, only instinct and for this they are saved. .

Sometimes what I see in my dreams flashes before my eyes when I am wake. Especially in those moments where I stand on the outside looking in. Images of worldly destruction through fire and flood come to my eyes as if it is happening at the very moment my mind is conceiving the images. The life of man destroyed by fire, wind and water - the elements destroying and drowning them all away. Snuffed until there are none...and it is when we are none that the world is deemed cleansed.

And I see all the animals rise above the land that has fallen away. Floating fantastical - ethereally in the skies, protected by the heavens. Saved from the punishment and destruction that the evil and sin of men caused.

And I wonder if the future men are eternally cursed with suffering because of the actions and sins of men long passed? Is OUR own suffering the ultimate divine punishment of past sin? Is it to be so legendary it pains us like an arrow through the heart until our very last breath?

All of this over a dream. Over visions that haunt my tired soul as I stand in darkness, peering at everyone who doesn't see me, dreaming on my feet dreams no one should dare to dream.

Still I have to wonder what it all means.