Hope is never alone; first there must be sadness. If it was never dark, we would never see the light at the end.
Wide Open Skye
A dark emerald green notebook, much scuffed and with a worn cover. The pages however are crisp and clean, the writing small and neat....
Saturday, 27 September 2008
Another break in the annuals of my thoughts...
I told myself I didn't need to write, to record my thoughts, but I've missed the soothing scratch of my quill across the roughened parchment. I've missed the way it forms my thoughts into some semblance of order. And I've missed feeling like I have something worthwhile to record.
I've had no strength lately, though I've not made much progress training. I've been terribly busy; it seems just as I finish one thing, two others jobs take its place. Theres never enough time to a day, and I feel myself dragging more and more. Sleep is a word foreign now...it takes second place to the things I must accomplish. Today, when the massive raids were called, I felt sluggish to even respond-and it cost me a few harsh blows from the creatures that were invading in the Wastelands. Even though I've found a demon spear, I felt no feeling of accomplishment at the end...I was tired. It was just another thing I'd had to get done, just another thing to work on, albeit a more pressing task. Elly and Pallas, Kel, Lucy and Sky...I went with them to sit and rest at the Sanctuary afterwords, but I could hardly keep my head up. And honestly...I didn't even know what I was doing there. I didn't truly feel like talking or being a part of anything. For once...and its horrible to say, but I had little interest or care in their conversation. I just wanted to sleep...I just wanted to go somewhere alone and curl up. I've felt a bit alone lately...but at the same time, I don't really care to do anything to change that.
Tus...dear warrior Tus, whom I've not talked to in far too long, ran into me at the raids. He talked to me later, saying he had an initiate who wanted to hear of the different professions...and he figured the best thing was to have a representative from each profession explain to her ourselves. He wanted me to explain what being a rogue was like. I was touched...that he would want me to explain my way of life to another, to explain a rogues skills and talents. And I answered her questions and finished talking to her and Tus, and went my own way.
I miss my cleric...we are both so busy, and I know his demands are greater than my own at the moment. He has no time to spend right now, and I honestly have no time or energy to spend if he was even available. But, I feel myself drifting away...I feel like I'm thinning out and slowly wearing out...I need something to tie me here before I become a ghost and slip away like mist...
Skyelark posted @ 22:16 -
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